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Entry #0006 (11/15/2022) - Notepad
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DATE: November 15th, 2022
TIME: 11:25 PM
MOOD: 😐 could be better.

i've been alright lately, a lot less nervous about moving. although i need to pick up the slack on packing, i've gotten a decent chunk done already. i went through my mom's room some more and had my dad help remove the mattresses and bed frame so i could get through to the dresser that was behind it. there's... a lot in there. mostly just actual bags of trash? like bags of receipts and such that she would've had in her purse that she just dumped into a bag and left in there. but it's whatever.

i also found a box of cards-- holiday cards, that is-- that were mostly for me from when i was 1-3. birthday, christmas, easter, valentines, thanksgiving... and some that were uh, anniversary cards. i'm definitely taking the cards that were meant for me. i need all the keepsakes i can get.

it really isn't fair, you know? she didn't even make it to 55. she won't get to see my wedding. she won't get to meet my friends. she won't get to meet grandchildren if i ever have kids. she was my best friend when nobody else would be.

i didn't deserve to lose my mom at 19. she didn't deserve to die at 54. she didn't deserve it. she didn't deserve to be sick.

that's all for now.